Sunday, March 24, 2013

THE HUMOR OF SMARTS

THE HUMOR OF SMARTS

 

Smart Train Driver
 
A train got off rails, started running in fields all around and ultimately stopped. Inquiry was made. Driver was strongly rebuked and asked the reason.
 
He explained "Well this idiot was standing right on the track of the train, was not paying attentions to horns, making vulgar funny gestures ridiculing me and not moving away.
 
The inquirers angrily asked, "Well you idiot, you should have crushed and killed him rather than getting off track and risk so many passengers' life to save his."
 
The driver said, "Sir, I wanted exactly to do that, I was angry at his vulgar gestures at me, so I raised the speed of the train to crush him. When train came closer, that jerk got off tracks and started running in the fields and I started chasing to kill him as you said."
 

The Smart Wife
 
A husband came from a paid seminar on married life, wanted to express his bad luck of ugly wife said, "The lecturer told us, the wife of an Idiot is generally beautiful and ............"
 
The wife interrupted the husband and said, "Seems you don't have any work other then praising me all the times."
 

The Smart Husband
 
The husband asked wife, "I know you have very sharp memory and you don't forget the face you have seen once."
Wife asked, "Yes that is true, but why?"
 
The husband said, "Well, I just broke your mirror while moving the table and it will be a while before I can replace it for you. I hope you remember your face till then and not beach at me."
 

The Smart Saint
 
The angry husband blasted, "You always make the dish of tomatoes and I am tired. Do you know, our saints say, 'the man who eats too much tomatoes is reborn as a Jackass in next life'."
 
The wife said, "Yes, but you should have thought that in your last life."
 

The Smart Trainer
 
The mountain climber trainee was half way up with trainer and he asked Guru, "What happens If I broke this rope in middle here?"
 
The trainer assured him, "Don't worry, we got lots of ropes down below for you."

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